Alone

DS left for Denver this morning to give a talk at some science convention. He's always leaving me for crap like that. Remember last winter? The winter I spent alone for three months? He's lucky proposed that winter, or he would have come home to an empty house.

DS leaving always presents me with the dilemma of feeding myself, at which I am notoriously bad. I asked a friend at lunch today whether I should have spaghetti o's, ramen noodles, or ravioli's. He said I should just starve than eat that crap. (I really don't see what's wrong with them, they're yummy and fill my tummy!) As it turns out, I nearly did just that. I did have some yogurt though, and I'm thankfully not hungry. I don't know what it is about cooking, but 9 times out of 10, I walk in the kitchen, look at the stove, and decide I'd rather stay hungry than turn it on. Thankfully, the same doesn't apply to baking things like cookies. Dessert is definitely worth the effort. Dinner? Not so much.

People tell me that cooking is rewarding and lots of other things that are supposed to entice me to start doing it. It's true, DS makes some tasty things that I wish I had had tonight. However, the truth is, as implied above, I'd just as soon eat ramen every night. Not even that, I'd even eat the same chicken flavor every night. There are too many things that go into common foods that I just don't like, like onions, or any type of pepper what so ever. I'm just not impressed with food enough to spend more than 3 minutes on it.

The other thing DS leaving does is make me feel lost in my apartment. I'm not sure why, we don't even really spend a lot of one-on-one time when he is here. We're kinda solitary people for the most part. But he's also like an anchor, and when he's gone, I drift from room to room as if I suddenly don't know what to do with myself. I tried to alleviate that by going clothes shopping tonight, and then working out. Hopefully, I'll get to sleep alright. It's weird going to bed when he's not here, as he's always in bed before me, and almost always fully asleep before I get there. Going to bed before him makes me feel like it's 8 o'clock, even when it's midnight.

Tomorrow's taken care of, because it's BSG night (though we're caught up on the series now, so BSG has morphed into movie night, soon to be Firefly night). Thursday should also be okay, since it's TVNIGHT with Matt. Dinner both nights is still up in the air, though BSG night usually comes with food and is therefore hopeful.

Of course, considering the hours I've already put into work this week (21, and it's only Tuesday), maybe I can just get two lunches and have dinner at work. If I were a monkey, I'd ask you to send bananas!